Am I Ready To Date ?

“There’s a ton of pressure all around me to date. There’s also a ton of cute guys.”—Marilyn

“Some girls come on strong, and I want to say yes. But if I ask my parents, I know what their answer will be.”—John.

THE urge to be with someone special—and to be with someone who thinks you are special—can be incredibly strong, even at a very young age. “I started to feel the pressure to date when I was 11,” recalls Jane. Brittany says: “At school you feel like you’re only half a person if you’re not dating someone—anyone!”
What about you? Are you ready to date? To answer that, we first need to address a more basic question:
What Is “Dating”?
Mark your response to the following questions:
You regularly go out with a certain member of the opposite sex. Are you dating?
□ Yes
□ No
You and a member of the opposite sex are attracted to each other. Several times a day, you text-message or talk to this person on the phone. Are you dating?
□ Yes
□ No
Every time you get together with your friends, you pair off with the same person of the opposite sex. Are you dating?
□ Yes
□ No


You most likely had no problem answering the first question. But you may have paused before responding to the second and the third. What exactly is dating? Really, dating is any social activity in which your romantic interest is focused on one particular person and that person’s interest is focused on you. So the answer to all three questions listed above is yes. Whether on the phone or face-to-face, in the open or in secret, if you and a friend of the opposite sex have a special romantic understanding and communicate regularly, it’s dating. Are you ready to go down that road? A consideration of three questions will help you find out.


Why Do You Want to Date?
In many cultures dating is regarded as a legitimate way for two people to become better acquainted. But dating should have an honorable purpose—to help a young man and woman determine if they want to get married to each other.

Granted, some of your peers might take a casual view of dating. Perhaps they simply enjoy being with a special friend of the opposite sex, without any intention of marriage. Some might even view such a friend as little more than a trophy or an accessory to be seen with in public to boost their own self-esteem. Often, though, such shallow relationships are short-lived. “Many young ones who date break up with each other a week or two later,” says a girl named Heather. “They come to view relationships as transitory—which in a sense prepares them for divorce rather than for marriage.”
Clearly, when you date someone, you’re affecting that person’s feelings. So be sure your intentions are honorable. Think: Would you like someone to play with your feelings as if they were some child’s toy—to be picked up for a moment and then quickly abandoned? A youth named Chelsea says: “Part of me wants to say that dating should be just for fun, but it’s no fun when one person is taking it seriously and the other isn’t.”

You’re How Old?
At what age do you think it’s appropriate for a youth to start dating? ․․․․․
Now ask one or both of your parents the same question, and fill in their answer. ․․․․․
Chances are, the first number you wrote down is lower than the second. Or maybe not! You might be among the many youths who are wisely putting off dating until they’re old enough to know themselves better. That’s what Danielle, 17, decided to do. She says: “Thinking back to two years ago, what I would have looked for in a potential mate was so different from what I would look for now. Basically, even at this point I don’t trust myself to make such a decision. When I feel that my personality has been stable for a couple of years, then I’ll think about dating.”
There’s another reason why waiting is wise. The Bible uses the phrase “the bloom of youth” to describe the period of life when sexual feelings and romantic emotions first become strong. (1 Corinthians 7:36) To maintain close association with one particular member of the opposite sex while you’re still in this phase can fan the flames of desire and lead to wrong conduct. True, that might mean little to your peers. Many of them are all too eager to experiment with sex. But you can rise above that kind of thinking! (Romans 12:2) After all, the Bible urges you to “flee from sexual immorality.” (1 Corinthians 6:18, New International Version) By waiting until you’re past the bloom of youth, you can “ward off calamity.”—Ecclesiastes 11:10.

Are You Ready to Get Married?
To help you answer the above question, take a good look at yourself. Consider the following:
Relationships. How do you treat your parents and siblings? Do you often lose your self-control with them, perhaps using harsh or sarcastic language to make a point? What would they say about you in that regard? How you deal with family members indicates how you will treat a mate.—Read Ephesians 4:31.
Demeanor. Are you positive or pessimistic? Are you reasonable, or do you always insist on doing things a certain way—your way? Can you keep calm when under pressure? Are you patient? Cultivating the fruitage of God’s spirit now will help you prepare for being a husband or a wife later.—Read Galatians 5:22, 23.
Finances. How well do you handle money? Are you often in debt? Can you hold down a job? If not, why not? Is it because of the job? the employer? Or is it because of some habit or trait that you need to work on? If you have trouble handling your own finances, how will you manage those of a family?—Read 1 Timothy 5:8.

The person you marry deserves nothing less than a spiritually strong partner.—Read Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10

Are You Ready to Get Married?

To help you answer the above question, take a good look at yourself. Consider the following:
Relationships. How do you treat your parents and siblings? Do you often lose your self-control with them, perhaps using harsh or sarcastic 
language to make a point? What would they say about you in that regard? How you deal with family members indicates how you will treat a mate.—Read Ephesians 4:31.
Demeanor. Are you positive or pessimistic? Are you reasonable, or do you always insist on doing things a certain way—your way? Can you keep calm when under pressure? Are you patient? Cultivating the fruitage of God’s spirit now will help you prepare for being a husband or a wife later.—Read Galatians 5:22, 23.
Finances. How well do you handle money? Are you often in debt? Can you hold down a job? If not, why not? Is it because of the job? the employer? Or is it because of some habit or trait that you need to work on? If you have trouble handling your own finances, how will you manage those of a family?—Read 1 Timothy 5:8.

Do you take the initiative to read God’s Word, to engage in the ministry, and to participate at Christian meetings? The person you marry deserves nothing less than a spiritually strong partner.—Read Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10.

What You Can Do
Being pressured to date before you’re ready would be like being forced to take a final exam for a course that you’ve barely started. Obviously, that wouldn’t be fair! You need time to study your subject so you can become familiar with the kind of problems you’ll face in the test.

It’s similar with dating. As we’ve seen, dating is no trivial matter. So before you’re ready to focus on one particular person, you need to take time to study a very important “subject”—how to build friendships. Later, when you meet the right person, you’ll be in a better position to build a solid relationship. After all, a good marriage is the union of two good friends.

Waiting to date won’t stifle your freedom. On the contrary, it will give you more freedom to ‘rejoice in your youth.’ (Ecclesiastes 11:9) And you’ll have time to prepare yourself by developing your personality and, most important, your spirituality.—Lamentations 3:27.

In the meantime, you Cana enjoy the company of the opposite sex. What’s the best way to do so? Associate together in properly supervised mixed groups. A girl named Tammy says: “I think it’s more fun that way. It’s better to have a lot of friends.” Monica agrees. “The group idea is a really good idea,” she says, “because you get to see people with different personalities.”

In contrast, if you focus on one person too soon, you set yourself up for heartache. So take your time. Use this period of your life to learn how to cultivate and maintain friendships. Later, if you choose to date, you’ll have a better idea of who you are and what you need in a lifelong partner.

She Was A Virgin

A guy (Names withheld) dated a girl for 2 years without sexual intercourse. Even after the Introduction, the girl did not allow him to touch her so a wedding date was fixed. The day before the wedding  was the bachelors eve so all his friends were in attendance with their girlfriends and fun rented the air. It was wild and captivating, in time he became horny from watching his friends and their partners and again his Fiancee turned him down begging him to wait a little longer. At last the D-Day came and the groom was patiently waiting for the wedding to come to an end. Finally they became Man and Wife!

Back in their matrimonial home, the man invited his woman to the bathroom but she refused that she is too shy to take a bath with him.  After that he made passes but she complained of tiredness and needed some rest. He got mad and left her alone. At 10pm, a 5 man armed robbers attacked the neighborhood and their apartment was not spared. They robbed them and decided to rape the wife. The first disvirgined her and others took turns in ravaging her. She lost  her consciousness and was rushed to the hospital. After she regained her consciousness, her dear husband sent her packing.

Did he do the right thing by sending her away? What would you do if you were in his shoes?

Am Married But Falling In Love With Another Man

 This is the true life story of a woman called Rebecca, she  came out of an abusive marriage, as she gave birth to 2 kids for the husband, at a point she decided to get a divorce, so she left the Husband.

After been through many ordeals the kids were staying with their father, so she relocated  from  Jefferson Ohio  to another city in Ohio named Cleveland ,

Wife cheating on Husband

she  got lucky and got a job,so she was staying with a girl friend, as time went on she had a misunderstanding with her girlfriend, so she had to leave the House. Got another apartment she was sharing with a room mate named Daniel, they lived together sharing apartment and at a point they became intimate and started having sex.

Prior to this period she tried the internet online dating sites, and was talking to a man ( Larry) she met online and was so in love with this man, the man made a lot of promises to her and told her she was the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. She loved this man so much and knew she would marry him immediately if they were in the altar.  Larry sent her an engagement ring, she lost contact with this Larry, even though she lived with the thoughts of  him with each passing day and missed him more than oxygen but had to live on waiting for him to come.

After involvement in many sexual activities with Daniel her room mate,

Daniel was taking good care of Rebecca and taking care of all the bills, so they decided to marry each other, and was living a happy family life there after. Three years after marriage Larry (Rebecca online partner) got in touch with Rebecca, it was one of the happiest day for Rebecca as she missed  Larry so much and their love became rekindled. She had to continue having an extra marital affairs and was so much in love  with Larry, she told Larry about her marriage with Daniel cos she had no choice then, but  he still wants her even though she is married, after all he met her before Daniel.
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Now Rebecca does not want to hurt Daniel as she realize he love her so much and care about her,

and he was the man that gave her shelter when they was no one, but still she love Larry so much and wouldn't want Larry to go, according to her Larry is her life . So she is  considering running away with Larry. She is so confused  she cannot LIVE WITHOUT HIM.

13 Ways To Know Your Boyfriend/Girlfriend Is cheating On You

Having a girlfriend or boyfriend can be a whole lot of fun and always the dreams of most of us, It becomes frustrating when he or she starts acting unusual, act different around you and seek for every opportunity to leave you. It could be a problem with trust issues or he or she wants some freedom from you. But he or she also might be cheating on you. Here are some signs to tell  he or she is cheating on you:

1. He or She use to be someone that was caring, loving and understanding, and suddenly they  have become moody suddenly, and eager to start fights? Sometimes, a cheating lover will displace his or her shame, anger, and guilt onto you by starting a fight, which can then be blamed on you. In short, they need a place to throw off their negative feelings. So they can get involve in any activities that will make them fight you.
   
 2. Routine: Is he or she, for instance, coming home from work later than usual on some nights? Sometimes these small changes to a person's routine mean nothing more than life has given them a reason to be unavailable, but they are still something that you want to be aware of, they could be spending time with someone they just met, or having a date with, but do not think too much about it, make sure you ask him about work and what have been going on in his or her place of work.
  
 3. Does he/she allow you to touch, or look through their phone, emails, etc.? If your boyfriend or girlfriend is hiding their phone from you, or deleting all their messages before letting you have it, then there is something they don't want you to see. In most cases they might be scared you will get angry and heart broken.
  
  4. Notice how often they leave the room  when they receive calls, especially if he or she was someone that always stay with you when she receives most of her calls. If you ask who called or text ed them, do they always tell you "It's nobody or a friend or family member that often Text them?" These are also important signals, which show that your fiancee, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc. has something to hide.
  

  5. Is your boyfriend or girlfriend is constantly putting someone else down?  They may be saying awful things about that person, but pay attention to the fact that they are still talking about them 24/7. They are trying to fool you into believing the person is undesirable, thus throwing the suspicion off them.
  
   6. Do they have other email accounts, or other online accounts? Or begin to, out of nowhere, change their passwords to keep you out of their accounts? Normally, if they didn't give you their password to start with, this is no problem. But if they've suddenly changed it to protect messages they've written, or chats they've had, you should be aware.
   
  7. Has your boyfriend or girlfriend stopped talking to you? Did your significant other always have things to say, and has suddenly become distant? Your relationship may be losing intimacy because your lover has started a new one with someone else.
   

 

8. Does he or she become angry when you come over unannounced, or only text you when they are at home, never calling you? These are also signs of a between-the-sheets betrayal. For some reason, they do not want you at their home at certain times, and they do not want to call you while they are at home.
   

 9. Watch for earring on passenger side of the car, or a condom is behind their bed or even in the car, extra time will probably be taken to dispose of those items.
   
   
 10. Does he smell different when he comes near you? Everyone knows this one is cliche, but it is also true. If he's coming around smelling like a perfume that you don't wear, then he's been too close with someone who wears it or probably hug the person .
   
 11. Have his or her friends begun to act oddly around you? When you casually talk to his friends, do they seem anxious, nervous, or eager to leave? They probably know something you don't know.
  
  12. Notice whether he begins to buy you gifts out of nowhere, or she starts casually mentioning an end to your relationship. Questions such as, "What would you do if we broke up," are key hints. Men and women, both, become guilty. This guilt can easily be forgotten with an action or item for the other person that makes the cheater seem selfless.
   
  13. Catch them in a lie. Casually ask a boyfriend or girlfriend where they were such and such day, and let them answer. Remember their answer, and ask again a few days later. If they are lying constantly, then they will have a hard time keeping up. They may start to get angry with these simple questions, another big hint.
   
Please your suggestions and opinions count here, so do well to comment and   tell us what you think and what your contribution could me.

Sexual Relationship That Was Detrimental

Terry was a young man who fell in love with a lady named Ann , they were so much in love that they decided to get married to each other , the relationship grew further and Ann became pregnant, it was a joyous moment for the family after 10 years of marriage with no pregnancy.

During Ann pregnancy periods Terry was always eating out cause he didn't know how to cook, his mother in law  said she would be willing to always go and prepare food for  her son in law in their home during Ann's stay in the hospital , prior to this period she was doing everything to seduce Terry( her son in law) . Looking at Terry seductively , watching him naked as he was bathing , and even demanding for a peck that turns into kiss, all this was unknown to Ann. When she does observe she takes it that her mom will never hurt her not even in her marriage.

Terry couldn't tell his wife that was in the hospital because she was soon to give birth to a bouncing baby, so he kept the secret of his seductive mother in law to himself not knowing the situation will get worst, hence he was finally lured into sex by his mother in law and became a regular sex partner of his mother in law. 

During this period the mother in law attitude change towards her husband ( Ann's father ) she became disrespectful and rude , though Ann's father was in a financial plight and couldn't support the family . It got to the stage where the two sex partners became too regular with their sexual activities , eventually Ann's mom became pregnant as confirmed by their family doctor . Ann's father had an heart attack when he got the news and was admitted in a nearby hospital. Terry was brutally beaten by Ann's elder brother, for impregnating his sister and mother between the space of 8 months. Now Ann's mom is rejected by her immediate family even Ann's grandmother and grandfather have rejected her mother ( Terry fuck mate ) because her act of infidelity is a taboo against their tradition .

Few months later Ann's mom was in labor and her condition became critical, the doctor demanded that a family member sign some documents for a surgery to be done so as to save her life and that of the unborn child .

Now Ann's mom life is in peril and the life of the unborn baby, remember the baby is innocent to the adulterous attitude of  the adults , So please what will you suggest the family to do if you were related to them ? Please leave a  comment as it could go along way to save someone's life and help someone make the right decision.

What Will You Do, If You Were Cheated on?

A man walked up to me, and told me he was planning a marriage ceremony with his soon to become wife, and after spending greater portion of his savings for the marriage, he discovered that his finance  had cheated on him 2 weeks prior to the wedding date, then he looked up the sky and asked the Creator of mankind why such was happening to him,  he quickly called and cancelled the marriage with a vow never to trust any woman in this world.

  Every one invited were forced to ask the parties involve in the marriage what was the  reason for the cancellation, but the man told them to ask the woman, and when she was asked she told every one to help her beg the man, that she just wanted to have to test of another man knowing it was going to be the last time she had another man, so she don't get to cheat when she is married, she was forced to cheat because her husband slept with another woman during their courtship and she understood he was doing it for the last time. Now the whole family is Trying to see how they an help out.

    So please I want everyone that read this to tell me what they will tell the couples if they were to advise them?