A House Divided The Impact of Divorce on Adolescents

THE experts thought they had it right. ‘You need to focus on your happiness,’ they advised parents in troubled marriages, quickly adding: ‘Don’t worry about the children. They’re resilient. It’s easier for them to deal with divorce than to live with two parents who can’t get along!’

Yet, some counselors who once sang the praises of divorce have changed their tune. ‘Divorce is war,’ they now say. ‘Neither party walks away without wounds; nor do the children.’

The Myth of Easy Divorce

It could make a hit TV sitcom. The plot? Dad and Mom divorce. Mom gets custody of the children and then marries a widower with children of his own. Week after week the mismatched family faces one absurd predicament after another—each one being resolved in 30 minutes flat with no shortage of witty humor in the process.

Perhaps the above situation makes for entertaining TV. But a real-life divorce is no sitcom. On the contrary, the process is painful. “Divorce is litigation,” writes M. Gary Neuman in his book Emotional Infidelity. “Someone is suing someone. The second you decide to divorce, you are giving up control over your child. You are also giving up control over your finances, and perhaps even where you will live. You may resolve your issues in mediation, but maybe not. Ultimately, a stranger called a judge could be the one to tell you how often you will see your child and how much of your money you will keep. Unfortunately, that stranger doesn’t think exactly like you.”

Often, divorce merely exchanges one set of problems for another. Indeed, everything from living arrangements to financial status may change—and likely not for the better. And then there is the impact divorce has on children.

‘THIS TIME I’LL GET IT RIGHT’

Studies reveal that second marriages have a higher failure rate than first ones, and third marriages fare even worse. In his book Emotional Infidelity, M. Gary Neuman points out one reason for this. “If you have difficulties in your first marriage,” he writes, “it’s not all about your poor choice of a spouse. It’s about you. You fell in love with this person. You worked with this person to create whatever you have or don’t have.” Neuman’s conclusion? “It’s better to get rid of the problem and keep your spouse than to get rid of your spouse and keep the problem.”

Divorce and Adolescents

Divorce can devastate children, regardless of their age. Some claim that adolescents fare better. After all, the reasoning goes, they are more mature and are in the process of separating from their parents anyway. However, researchers see a flip side to the coin. They have found that because of those very factors, divorce can hit adolescents the hardest.* Consider the following:

• As they navigate their way toward adulthood, adolescents are highly insecure, perhaps even more so than when they were children. Do not let their independent streak fool you—adolescents need the anchor of family stability as never before.
• At the very time in life when adolescents are learning to forge mature friendships, divorce teaches them to be skeptical of such values as trust, loyalty, and love. Later, as adults, they may avoid close relationships altogether.
• While it is common for children of all ages to act out their pain, adolescents are more likely to do so in dangerous ways, including delinquency, alcohol abuse, and drug abuse.

This is not to say that adolescents whose parents divorce are doomed emotionally or otherwise. They can succeed, especially if they have a relationship with both parents.^# However, it is naive to think that divorce will always be, as some might say, ‘better for the children’ or that it will put an end to all tension between spouses. In fact, some find that they have to deal more with their “intolerable” spouse after the divorce than before and on much more volatile issues, such as financial support or child custody. In such cases divorce does not end family problems; it simply moves them to a different arena.

IF A MARRIAGE ENDS

The Bible acknowledges that extreme circumstances may lead to divorce.* If that is the case in your family, how can you help your adolescent children to cope?

Tell your adolescent what is happening. If possible, both parents should do this. Together, let your adolescent know that the decision to divorce is final. Give assurance that he or she is not to blame and will continue to be loved by both parents.

Get off the battlefield—the war is over. Some parents remain entangled in conflict long after the divorce. They become, as one expert puts it, “legally divorced but still emotionally betrothed combatants who have not been able to negotiate a truce with peace.” Not only does this deprive adolescents of their parents—since Dad and Mom always seem caught up in one skirmish or another—but it also encourages them to pit one parent against the other in order to get their way. For instance, a boy might tell his mother: “Dad lets me stay out as late as I want. Why won’t you?” Not wanting her son to defect to the “enemy camp,” Mom relents.

If you share custody, encourage your adolescent to have a healthy relationship with your ex-spouse

Let your adolescent talk. Adolescents may reason, ‘If my parents stopped loving each other, they may stop loving me’ or ‘If my parents broke the rules, why can’t I?’ To alleviate your adolescent’s fears and to correct flawed thinking, give him or her plenty of opportunity to talk. But a caution: Do not switch roles and look to your adolescent for emotional support. This is your child, not your confidant.

Encourage the adolescent to have a healthy relationship with your ex-spouse. The person you divorced is your ex-spouse but not your child’s ex-parent. Bad-mouthing that person is damaging. Says the book Teens in Turmoil—A Path to Change for Parents, Adolescents, and Their Families: “If parents choose to use their children as artillery on the divorce battlefield, they must expect to reap what they have sown.”

Take care of yourself. At times, you will feel overwhelmed. But do not give up. Maintain a healthy routine. If you are a Christian, stay involved in spiritual activities. Doing so will help you and your adolescent to maintain balance.—Psalm 18:2; Matthew 28:19, 20; Hebrews 10:24, 25.

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* According to the Bible, only sexual relations outside the marriage provide adequate grounds to end the marriage with the opportunity to remarry. (Matthew 19:9) If unfaithfulness occurs, it is up to the innocent mate—not to family members or others—to decide whether divorce is the best option.—Galatians 6:5.

A Third Option

What if you are in a troubled marriage and have thought about divorce? This article has presented compelling reasons to reconsider. Divorce is not a cure-all for marital misery.

But do not misunderstand: The answer is not simply to tolerate a bad marriage. There is another option—If your marriage is in trouble, why not work to make it better? Do not hastily dismiss this idea by asserting that your marital problems are incurable. Ask yourself these questions:

• ‘What qualities initially drew me to my spouse? Are not those qualities still there to a degree?’—Proverbs 31:10, 29.
• ‘Can the feelings that I had before marriage be rekindled?’—Song of Solomon 2:2; 4:7.
• ‘Despite the actions of my mate, what can I do to apply the suggestions found [in “Secrets of Family Success”]?’—Romans 12:18.
• ‘Can I explain to my mate (face-to-face or in writing) just how I would like our relationship to improve?’—Job 10:1.
• ‘Can we sit down with a mature friend who can help us set realistic goals to improve our marriage?’—Proverbs 27:17.

The Bible says: “The shrewd one considers his steps.” (Proverbs 14:15) That principle applies not just when choosing a mate but also when considering what to do about a marriage relationship that is faltering. Indeed, as brought out [in “Secrets of Family Success”], successful families also have problems—the difference is in how they handle them.

To illustrate: Imagine that you have embarked on a long journey by car. It is inevitable that you will encounter problems along the way, including severe weather, traffic jams, and roadblocks. On occasion, you may even get lost. What will you do? Turn around and go back or find a way to overcome the obstacle and move forward? On the day of your wedding, you embarked on a journey that was sure to bring its share of problems, for the Bible says that “those who marry will have pain and grief.” (1 Corinthians 7:28, The New English Bible) The question is not whether problems will arise but how you will face them when they do. Can you find a way to overcome the obstacle and move forward? Even if you feel that your marriage is hopelessly lost, will you try to get help?—James 5:14.

Work to uphold the commitment you made on your wedding day

A Divine Institution

Marriage is a divine institution that should not be taken lightly. (Genesis 2:24) When problems seem insurmountable, remember the points discussed in this article.

1. Try to rekindle the love that you once felt.—Song of Solomon 8:6.

2. Decide what you can do to make your marriage better, and then do it.—James 1:22.

3. Clearly but respectfully tell your mate—either face-to-face or in writing—what improvements you feel need to be made in the marriage.—Job 7:11.

4. Get help. You do not have to save your marriage by yourself!

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Is Divorce the Answer?

FOUR THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT DIVORCE

After assessing the damage, the owners have a choice—either tear down the house or save it.

IS YOUR marriage at a similar juncture? Perhaps your spouse has betrayed your trust or recurring conflicts have sapped the joy from your relationship. If so, you might tell yourself, ‘We’ve fallen out of love’ or ‘We just aren’t meant for each other’ or ‘We didn’t know what we were doing when we got married.’ You could even be thinking, ‘Maybe we should divorce.’

Before making a hasty decision to end your marriage, think. Divorce does not always end life’s anxieties. On the contrary, often it merely exchanges one set of problems for another. In his book The Good Enough Teen, Dr. Brad Sachs warns: “Separating couples fantasize about the perfect divorce—the sudden and permanent passing of gray and stormy conflict, replaced by the cool, comforting breezes of serenity and congeniality. But such a state is just as eternally elusive as is the perfect marriage.” It is important, then, to be fully informed and to approach the question of divorce realistically.

The Bible and Divorce

The Bible does not treat divorce casually. It states that Jehovah God views as treacherous and hateful the frivolous putting away of one’s mate, perhaps with the motive of taking another spouse. (Malachi 2:13-16) Marriage is a permanent bond. (Matthew 19:6) Many marriages that broke up on trivial grounds could have been saved if partners had been more forgiving.—Matthew 18:21, 22.

At the same time, the Bible allows for divorce and remarriage on one ground—sexual relations outside the marriage. (Matthew 19:9) Therefore, if you learn that your mate has been unfaithful, you have the right to terminate the marriage. Others should not impose their views on you, and it is not the purpose of this article to tell you what to do. In the end, you are the one who will live with the consequences; therefore, you are the one who must decide.—Galatians 6:5.

Nevertheless, the Bible states: “The shrewd one considers his steps.” (Proverbs 14:15) Hence, even if you have Scriptural grounds for divorce, you would do well to give serious thought to what that step will entail. (1 Corinthians 6:12) “Some may think that they have to decide quickly,” says David, in Britain. “But having been through a divorce, I can say from experience that time is needed to think things through.”*

Let us consider four important issues you need to think about. As we do, please note that none of the divorced individuals quoted say that they made a wrong decision. However, their comments highlight some of the challenges that often arise in the months and even years after ending a marriage.

1 The Problem of Finances

Daniella, in Italy, was married for 12 years when she found out that her husband had been having an affair with a colleague. “By the time I knew about it,” says Daniella, “the woman was six months pregnant.”

After a period of separation, Daniella decided to get a divorce. “I tried to save my marriage,” she says, “but my husband continued to be unfaithful.” Daniella feels that she made the right choice. Still, she relates: “As soon as we separated, my economic situation became disastrous. Sometimes I didn’t even have an evening meal. I would just drink a glass of milk.”

Maria, in Spain, suffered a similar setback. “My ex-husband doesn’t give us any financial support,” she says, “and I have to work very hard to pay off debts he had. I also had to move from a comfortable house to a small apartment in an unsafe area.”

As these experiences show, the breakup of a marriage often deals a devastating financial blow to women. In fact, a seven-year European study revealed that while the income of men increased by 11 percent after divorce, women’s income decreased by 17 percent. “It’s difficult for some women,” says Mieke Jansen, who headed the study, “because they have to care for the children, find a job as well as deal with the emotional trauma of divorce.” London’s Daily Telegraph noted that according to some attorneys, such factors are “forcing people to think twice about splitting up.”

What might happen: If you divorce, there may be a reduction in your income. You may also have to move. If you retain custody, it may be difficult to support yourself and adequately care for the needs of your children.—1 Timothy 5:8.

2 Parenting Issues

“My husband’s unfaithfulness came as a terrible shock,” says a woman in Britain named Jane. “Also, I was devastated to think that he actually chose to leave us.” Jane divorced her husband. She still believes that she made the right decision, but she admits: “One challenge I faced was having to be both mom and dad to the children. I had to make all the decisions myself.”

The situation was similar with Graciela, a divorced mother in Spain. “I was given full custody of my 16-year-old son,” she says. “But adolescence is a difficult time, and I was ill-prepared to raise my son alone. I spent days and nights sobbing. I felt like a failure as a mother.”

Those who share custody may face an additional problem—having to negotiate with the ex-spouse on such delicate issues as visitation arrangements, child support, and discipline. Christine, a divorced mother in the United States, says: “Creating a working relationship with your ex is not easy. There are so many emotions involved, and if you’re not careful, you could end up using your child as a tool to try to manipulate the situation.”

What might happen: The custody arrangements set forth in a court of law may not be what you would prefer. If you share custody, your ex-spouse may not be as reasonable as you would like regarding the aforementioned matters of visitation, financial support, and so on.

“EVERY CHILD’S BIRTHRIGHT”

“When I was five years old, my father had a brief affair with his secretary, and my parents divorced. As far as taking care of me, they did everything ‘right’ according to the wisdom of the day. They reassured me that while they did not love each other anymore, they still loved me, and after my father departed to his bachelor apartment across town, both continued to care for my material needs.

“Two years later my mother remarried, and we moved out of the country. After that, I only saw my father every few years. I have seen him just once in the past nine years. He missed most of my growing up, and he does not know my three children—his grandchildren—except through what I’ve shared with him in letters and photos. They have missed knowing their grandfather.

“As a child of divorce, I grew up without any visible scars. But inside I battled monsters of rage, depression, and insecurity without knowing why. My trust in men was nonexistent. It wasn’t until I was in my 30’s that a mature friend helped me to identify the roots of my hostility and I began to work at letting go of it.

“My parents’ divorce took away from me every child’s birthright—the feeling of being secure and protected. The world is a cold, scary place, but it seems to me that the family unit is a wall against it, where the child can come to feel nurtured and comforted. Shatter the family unit, and the protective wall crumbles too.”—Diane.

3 The Effect of Divorce on You

Mark, from Britain, was betrayed by his wife more than once. “The second time,” he says, “I couldn’t cope with the possibility that it could happen again.” Mark divorced his wife, but he found that his feelings for her lingered. “When people say negative things about her, they think they’re helping; but they’re not,” he says. “Love stays for a long time.”

David, quoted earlier, was similarly devastated when he found out that his wife was involved with another man. “I reacted with total disbelief,” he says. “I truly wanted to spend every day of my life with her and our children.” David chose to divorce, but the breakup has left him with doubts about his future. “I wonder if someone could really love me or whether this might happen again if I remarry,” he says. “My confidence has been shaken.”

If you are divorced, it is only to be expected that you will experience a wide range of emotions. On the one hand, you might still feel love for this person with whom you shared a one-flesh bond. (Genesis 2:24) On the other hand, you might feel resentful over what has occurred. “Even after several years,” says Graciela, quoted earlier, “you feel confused, humiliated, and helpless. Many happy moments from your marriage come to mind, and you think: ‘He used to tell me that he couldn’t live without me. Was he always lying? Why did this happen?’”

What might happen: You may have lingering feelings of anger and resentment over the ways in which your spouse mistreated you. At times, loneliness may be overwhelming.—Proverbs 14:29; 18:1.

4 The Effect of Divorce on Children

“It was devastating,” says José, a divorced father in Spain. “The worst moment was when I discovered that the other man was my sister’s husband. I just wanted to die.” José found that his two boys—ages two and four—were also affected by their mother’s course. “They could not come to terms with the situation,” he says. “They didn’t understand why their mother was living with their uncle and why I had taken them with me and moved in with my sister and my mother. If I had to go somewhere, they would ask, ‘When are you coming home?’ or they would say, ‘Daddy, don’t leave us!’”

Children are often the forgotten casualties on the divorce battlefield. But what if two parents just do not get along? In such a case, is divorce really “better for the children”? In recent years, that notion has come under attack—especially when marital problems are not extreme. The book The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce states: “Many adults who are trapped in very unhappy marriages would be surprised to learn that their children are relatively content. They don’t care if Mom and Dad sleep in different beds as long as the family is together.”

Admittedly, children are often aware of parental conflicts, and marital tension can take a toll on their young minds and hearts. However, to assume that a divorce will automatically be in their best interests could be a mistake. “The structure that marriage provides appears to help parents maintain the kind of consistent, moderate discipline to which children respond, even when the marriage is less than ideal,” write Linda J. Waite and Maggie Gallagher in their book The Case for Marriage.

What might happen: Divorce could have a devastating effect on your children, especially if you do not encourage them to have a healthy relationship with your ex-spouse.—See the box “Caught in the Middle.”

This article has discussed four factors that you would do well to consider if you are thinking about divorce. As mentioned earlier, if your spouse has been unfaithful, the decision is yours to make. Whichever course you choose, you need to be aware of the consequences. Know what challenges you will face, and be prepared to deal with them.

After considering the matter, you might feel that the better option is to work to improve your marriage. But is that really possible?

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What Would We Do Without Donkeys?

ON THE streets of Addis Ababa—the capital city of Ethiopia, the 16th most populous country in the world—the donkey has long been an important form of transportation. Most drivers of automobiles have learned to adapt to them, aware that donkeys generally know where to go and do not lack determination. While donkeys do not fear heavy traffic, their wide loads are tricky, and they do not look back. So, if you don’t want to brush against the charcoal, dried cow dung, or whatever the load happens to be, you had better move out of the way!

The estimated donkey population in Ethiopia is about five million, almost 1 donkey for every 12 people. Millions of Ethiopians live on isolated hilltops, which are separated by deep gorges. Sections of the country’s large central plateau are divided off by countless small streams. To construct bridges or even unpaved access roads to these locations would strain the resources of any country. So the enduring and sure-footed donkey is an ideal means of transportation.

The donkey can handle just about all of Ethiopia’s many climates—from dry, hot lowlands to alpine regions. And it is splendidly suited for negotiating steep slopes, narrow footpaths, stony riverbeds, muddy passages, and other uneven terrain. It can go where no horse or camel can. For millions of people, the donkey is the main means of transporting goods, especially in cities where many homes cannot be reached by motorized vehicles.

Donkeys are able to negotiate tight corners and wind their way through narrow, fence-lined access paths. They need no costly tires and rarely have problems on slippery surfaces. They carry loads of all shapes and sizes, providing home delivery to almost anywhere. While red-faced car drivers sit blowing their horns, donkeys easily find their way through traffic jams. No policeman would think of fining a donkey when it enters a one-way street from the wrong end. And parking is never a problem. A donkey may sell for about 50 dollars, but when you consider the cost of motorized transportation, there is no comparison!

Donkeys in the Capital

In the morning, donkeys by the thousands travel to Addis Ababa—with a population of over 3,000,000—often from more than 15 miles [25 km] away. Wednesdays and Saturdays are especially busy, as these are the weekly market days. The journey may take up to three hours, requiring departures before dawn. Sometimes their owners walk with them, but more often, they run behind them, hurrying to keep up.

Common loads are bags of grain, vegetables, firewood, cement, and charcoal, as well as metal drums of cooking oil and cases of bottled drinks. Some donkeys carry loads of 200 pounds [90 kg] or more. Long loads, such as bamboo or eucalyptus poles, are tied to their sides and are dragged behind them on the road. Perhaps the most picturesque loads are the high bundles of straw or pressed hay under which the animals almost disappear.

On their way to market in the morning carrying their heavy loads, donkeys may trot at quite a speed. Once the sales are completed and their burdens are gone, they return home at a more leisurely pace, even stopping to nibble on vegetation by the roadside. On their days off, donkeys are still used for their daily duties of fetching water and fuelwood. They may also be lent or rented out. Some even belong to “fleets” that are part of professional donkey-pack transport operations! In some places donkeys pull carts, or at times, a pair will pull a fair-size wagon.

Worthy of Respect

Donkeys are relatively maintenance-free. They search out their own food and eat just about anything. When treated well, donkeys become attached to their masters. As to intelligence, they have been rated ahead of horses. They also have an excellent memory for directions. Unaccompanied, they can fetch water from locations over five miles away, only requiring that someone at each end load and unload them. They may even be equipped with bells so that people at addresses along the way can hear the donkey coming and accept its deliveries.

While donkeys are hard workers, they have firm opinions on the size of a maximum load, as well as when a pause is required. In these situations, or when the load has been positioned in a way that causes pain, they may just lie down. At such times they may be misunderstood and abused verbally or physically. You may recall the account in the Bible of this happening.—Numbers 22:20-31.

Donkeys deserve consideration and care. It is tragic when a load is not well secured and shifts, causing the donkey to fall into a ditch and break its legs. Sores, various parasites, foot rot, pneumonia, and other problems can weaken these diligent burden-bearers. In view of this, a modern donkey clinic has been established in Debre Zeyit, not far from Addis Ababa. It is equipped with computers, treatment rooms, vehicles for ambulatory treatment, and even a fine theater for donkey surgery. Thus, in 2002, about 40,000 donkeys received various forms of medical attention.

The patriarch Abraham crossed mountainous terrain with his donkey when on his way to Mount Moriah. (Genesis 22:3) Throughout the long history of the nation of Israel, the donkey was part of daily life. Even the triumphal entry of Jesus Christ into Jerusalem was on a donkey.—Matthew 21:1-9.

In Ethiopia too the donkey has a long history. Yet, here it has not lost its importance in people’s lives. While trucks and cars have changed over the years, the donkey is still the same model. And it is certainly deserving of respect!

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What It Takes to Drive an Elephant

MAN AND ELEPHANT—A LONG HISTORY

Man’s domestication of elephants has a long history. Perhaps the most famous example in antiquity is that of Hannibal, a Carthaginian general. In the third century B.C.E., the North African city of Carthage was fighting Rome in a century-long series of battles known as the Punic Wars. Hannibal assembled an army in the city of Cartagena, Spain, with the plan of marching on Rome. He first crossed the Pyrenees to enter what is now France. Then, in what Archaeology magazine terms “one of the boldest military maneuvers in history,” his army of 25,000 men—accompanied by 37 African elephants and scores of pack animals loaded with supplies—crossed the Alps into Italy. They had to contend with cold, snowstorms, rockslides, and hostile mountain tribes. That journey was extremely strenuous for the elephants. Not one of them survived Hannibal’s first year in Italy.

AS A mahout, or elephant driver, cooked his meal by the side of the Narmada River, he left his child between the trunk and forefeet of his resting elephant. The child repeatedly tried to move away, but “the recumbent elephant gently curled its trunk around the child and drew him back to where his father had left him,” recounts the book Project Elephant. “The father continued his cooking and appeared to have absolute confidence that the child was in safe custody.”

Work elephants have been in the service of man from as early as 2000 B.C.E. In ancient times, elephants were trained mainly for warfare. In modern India, they are trained to work. They are used in the logging industry, at religious festivals and weddings, in advertising, in circuses, and even for begging. How are these elephants domesticated? And how are they trained?

A Course in Elephant Training

A number of centers in India are equipped to care for elephant calves that have been captured, abandoned, or injured in the wild. One such training center is in Koni, in the state of Kerala. Here the calves are trained to become work elephants. A mahout must first win the trust of a calf. Feeding is an important way to build this trust. A calf recognizes its mahout’s voice, and when called for feeding, it will hurry over to receive its milk and millet paste. Training for work does not usually take place until young elephants reach their early teens. Then they are put to work when they reach the age of 25. In Kerala, government norms require that working elephants be retired at the age of 65.

To drive an elephant safely, the mahout must have good training. According to the Elephant Welfare Association of Trichur, Kerala, a new mahout needs intensive training for at least three months. Such training is not limited to learning to give commands. It also covers elephant science as a whole.

An adult elephant takes longer to train. From outside the enclosure where the elephant is kept, the trainer first teaches his animal to understand verbal commands. In Kerala, a mahout uses some 20 commands and signals to get his elephant to do the needed work. The mahout gives clear and loud commands and, at the same time, prods his elephant with a stick and shows it what to do. When a command is obeyed, the elephant is rewarded with a small treat. When the trainer is sure that his elephant is friendly, he enters the enclosure and caresses it. This interaction reinforces mutual trust. In time, the elephant can be taken outside—with caution, of course, as it still retains some of its wild characteristics. Until it becomes clear that the elephant is fully tamed, it is chained between two trainer elephants when taken out for bathing and for other excursions.

After an elephant grasps verbal commands, the mahout sits on its back and teaches it how to respond to physical commands by prodding it with his toes or heels. To make the elephant move forward, the mahout presses both of his big toes behind the elephant’s ears. To make it back up, he presses both of his heels into the animal’s shoulders. To avoid any confusion, verbal commands are given by just one mahout. An elephant will understand all the commands within three or four years. Thereafter, it never forgets them. Even though an elephant has a brain that is small in proportion to its body, it is a very intelligent animal.

Elephant Maintenance

An elephant needs to be kept healthy and in good spirits. A daily bath is important. At bath time, the mahout uses stones and neatly cut coconut husks to scrub his charge’s thick yet soft and sensitive skin.

The mahout scrubs his elephant’s thick yet soft and sensitive skin

Then comes breakfast. The mahout prepares a thick paste of wheat, millet, and horse gram, a type of fodder. The main course includes bamboo, palm leaves, and grass. The elephant is delighted if raw carrots and sugar cane are added as well. Elephants spend most of their time eating. They need about 300 pounds of food and some 40 gallons of water every day! To stay good friends with his pachyderm, the mahout has to satisfy these needs.

The Results of Abuse

The gentle Indian elephant cannot be driven or made to work beyond a certain point. Elephants may turn on mahouts who inflict punishment, verbal or otherwise. India’s Sunday Herald newspaper spoke of one tusker—that is, a male elephant with tusks—that “went be[r]serk . . . following ill-treatment by the mahouts. The elephant which was reacting to the beating meted out to it by the mahout went on a rampage . . . and had to be tranquilized.” In April 2007, India Today International reported: “In the past two months alone, more than 10 tuskers have run amok at festivals; since January last year, 48 mahouts have been killed by the raging beasts.” Such displays often occur during the period known as musth. This is an annual physiological phenomenon connected with the mating season, during which the testosterone level of healthy adult male elephants rises. The result is aggressive and erratic behavior toward other bull elephants and humans. Musth can last from 15 days to three months.

Another situation in which an elephant can get agitated is when it is sold and a new mahout takes over. Its attachment to the old mahout is evident. To effect a smooth transition, the previous mahout usually travels with it to its new home. There, both handlers work together until the new one gets used to the moods of the elephant. When a mahout dies and a new one takes over, problems can be even greater. However, the elephant eventually comes to recognize and accept the new situation.

Even though some people might fear this mighty land animal, a well-trained elephant will obey a kind master. When kindness reigns, the elephant need not even be chained when his mahout is temporarily absent. All the mahout needs to do is place one end of his stick on the elephant’s foot and the other end on the ground and ask the animal not to move. The elephant obediently stands still with the stick in place. As illustrated in the introduction, the cooperation between an elephant and its mahout can be both surprising and touching. Yes, a good driver can trust his elephant.

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Why Honor the Elderly?

ALONG the coast of California, U.S.A., is one of the world’s most photographed trees. It is known as the Lone Cypress. Reportedly, this tree is over 250 years old. Noted for its endurance, this beautiful tree has received attention in several ways. For instance, it has been fortified with supportive cables and with stonework around its base.
The Lone Cypress may remind us of the older Christians in our midst, who show remarkable endurance. One outstanding way that they do this is by proclaiming the good news. The prophet Joel foretold that “old men” would declare the Bible’s message. (Joel 2:28-32; Acts 2:16-21) Just think of the countless hours such ones spend earnestly helping others to learn about the “good news of the kingdom”! (Matt. 24:14) Some of these elderly Kingdom proclaimers have endured years of persecution or other difficulties. If a mere cypress tree is noted for endurance and is fortified with stonework and cables, how much more do the older ones among us deserve to be recognized and treated with dignity and honor!
As the Lone Cypress needs support, older ones need to be treated with dignity and honor
Jehovah God commanded his ancient people: “Before gray hair you should rise up, and you must show consideration for the person of an old man.” (Lev. 19:32) Among Jehovah’s servants today, we find excellent examples of faithful ones who have been ‘walking with God’ for decades. (Mic. 6:8) As they continue applying Scriptural principles, their gray-headedness is indeed “a crown of beauty.”—Prov. 16:31.
The apostle Paul instructed young Timothy: “Do not severely criticize an older man.” Rather, Timothy was to “entreat him as a father” and “older women as mothers.” (1 Tim. 5:1, 2) In effect, Timothy was to “rise up” before gray hair. Clearly, then, Jehovah expects our manner of speech to reflect such honor.
“In showing honor to one another take the lead,” states Romans 12:10. Overseers in the congregation certainly show honor to elderly Christians. But all of us are to take the lead in showing honor to one another.
Of course, family members have a special responsibility toward their parents and grandparents. In the case of the Lone Cypress, people have looked for ways to help preserve it, and they continue to do so. Surely, then, we should look for ways to help preserve the dignity of our aging parents and grandparents. For example, being a good listener will keep us from insisting on doing things our own way without regard for their feelings.—Prov. 23:22; 1 Tim. 5:4.
The elderly ones among us are very precious to Jehovah. He does not abandon them. (Ps. 71:18) The true God actually fortifies them to keep on serving him faithfully. May we too continue to support and honor the elderly.

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Chocolate From Bean to You

The unique taste of chocolate delights the palate of people the world over. Where does chocolate come from, and how is it produced? Come with us as we travel through the history of chocolate.

BOTANISTS say that wild cacao trees likely grew in the Amazon and Orinoco valleys of South America thousands of years ago. The Maya may have been the first to cultivate cacao (also called cocoa), which they took with them when they migrated to the Yucatán. The Aztec royalty thrived on the bitter chocolate drink concocted by mixing ground cacao beans with fermented corn or wine, which was then served in golden cups. It is said that the Aztec Emperor Montezuma drank more than 50 cups of chocolate a day.

Spanish conquistador Hernán Cortés (1485-1547) was much more interested in the golden cups than the liquid inside, although he did note that the Aztecs used cacao beans as money. He wasted no time in establishing cacao plantations. These plantations of “brown gold” paid off, and Spain essentially controlled the cacao bean market into the 18th century.

The Spaniards took the beans to Haiti, Trinidad, and the West African island of Bioko. One pod of beans was taken from that island to mainland Africa, and now a cacao trade flourishes in four West African nations.
Chocolate in Europe

In the 16th century, Cortés introduced the chocolate drink of the Aztecs to the Spanish court. The ladies of the Spanish royalty secretly sipped their spiced and sometimes peppered beverage, keeping it to themselves. In time, the drink was introduced to the upper echelons of European society.

Europeans were enamored with the novel taste and also the supposed healing properties of chocolate. In 1763 the brewers of British beer and ale felt so threatened by the soaring popularity of chocolate that they called for legislation to restrict its manufacture. Fierce competition in the chocolate trade led some to add starches to make the chocolate go further. To intensify the color of the chocolate, the English even added a bit of brick dust! The demand for better and tastier chocolate kept growing.

The industrial revolution introduced mechanization into the manufacturing process of chocolate. When the steam engine began to be used to power chocolate mills, chocolate went from being hand-ground to machine-ground. Chocolate experienced an even greater change in 1828 when the Dutch chemist Coenraad van Houten learned how to separate the cocoa powder and butter from the paste of the ground cacao beans. As a result, innovators later created the precise combination of chocolate liquor (a thick dark paste), cocoa butter, and sugar to produce solid “eating chocolate.”

In the latter half of the 1800’s, the Swiss developed a process that further refined chocolate. In this process, known as conching, the paste of ground beans is passed between porcelain disks for many hours, creating a silky chocolate that melts on the tongue. Connoisseurs claim that the best chocolate is conched for no less than 72 hours.

Many clever entrepreneurs, such as Hershey, Kohler, Lindt, Nestlé, Peter, Suchard, and Tobler—names you may recognize from chocolate boxes today—made significant contributions to the chocolate industry, either by inventing more efficient machinery or by refining chocolate recipes.

A cacao tree
The Source of Chocolate

The tropical cacao tree grows best within 20 degrees north or south of the equator. It thrives in a shady and humid climate. The trees produce flowers and fruit all year long. The fruit of the cacao tree, a melonlike pod, grows directly from the trunk and lower branches.
A machete and pods

What happens on cacao plantations at harvesttime? The ripe pods are cut from the tree using machetes or bamboo poles fitted with sharp knives. The pods are split open to reveal between 20 and 50 beans embedded in a white bittersweet pulp. The beans are then scooped out of the husk by hand. During harvesttime, harvesters often work from dawn till dusk splitting the pods and scooping out the beans. The beans are then covered and left for several days. It is during this stage that the pulp ferments and chemical reactions turn the cacao beans chocolate brown. Next, the beans are dried, either by spreading them out in the hot sun or using hot-air blowers. Drying preserves them for shipping and storage.

There are basically two types of cacao beans, the Forastero and the Criollo. The Forastero is the standard, or base, bean, which makes up the greater part of the world’s production. The main cultivation areas are in West Africa, Brazil, and Southeast Asia. The Criollo is the flavor bean. It is cultivated on a much smaller scale in Central America, Ecuador, and Venezuela. It adds the nutty or floral nuances to chocolate.
Dried cacao beans

After the drying process, the cacao beans are ready to be packed into sacks and shipped to chocolate manufacturers around the world, mainly in Europe and North America. About two handfuls of these dried cacao beans will make one pound of chocolate candy. It is difficult to imagine that the bitter seeds of the cacao fruit can be transformed into the delicate confections that we find in a box of chocolates, but the process has essentially not changed for centuries.
The Making of Chocolate

Upon arrival at the factory, the beans are cleaned and sorted. In much the same way as coffee beans are roasted to bring out their best flavor, the cacao beans are now roasted to bring out the full chocolate aroma. The beans are then cracked open. The dark brown particles inside, the nibs, are the basis for all cocoa and chocolate.

The nibs are ground to produce a thick dark paste, called chocolate liquor. When hardened, it is sold as baking chocolate. The liquor is then subjected to high pressure—the process that Van Houten invented—and cocoa butter is extracted, leaving a residue of cocoa powder. If extra cocoa butter is added to chocolate liquor, the tasty blend is on its way to becoming the eating chocolate that we are familiar with. Conching and other refining processes work together to produce the type of chocolate that consumers prefer today.
White, milk, and dark chocolate

So the next time you enjoy the rich, velvety flavor of chocolate, take a moment to think about the long journey it has made from the bitter bean growing in the Tropics to the appealing chocolate confection before you.

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A Fascinating Visit to Olympic National Park

HAVING been raised close to the original Mount Olympus in southern Europe, I was naturally curious about the Olympian qualities of a thumb of land thousands of miles away that extends into the Pacific from the edge of North America. A friend's mention of rain forests in that remote area—5,000 miles [8,000 km] northwest of the Amazon—was enough to lure me to Olympic National Park.
Map

A little homework before the visit revealed that the 900,000-acre [350,000 ha] park, located in the northwest corner of the United States in Washington State, is an intriguing array of natural wonders. Here, beneath the Pacific mist that enfolds shoreline and timberline, one can discover large trees, jagged coastline, and some of the wettest weather on earth. The park has tall mountains, snowcapped and overrun with slow-moving glaciers, and a rain forest as mysterious and dark as any in the Amazon region.

In 1788 an English captain named the highest peak—rising to just under 8,000 feet [at just under 2,500 meters]—Mount Olympus, after the legendary home of the mythical gods of Greece. To preserve this untamed wilderness, Olympic National Park was established in 1938.
Rain Forests in North America?
Hoh rain forest
Glacier-capped Mount Olympus descends to the Hoh rain forest

On a pleasant autumn morning, Mike, a native of the area and a guide, waited for my wife and me at the park headquarters, in Port Angeles. A tall, barrel-chested man, Mike takes pride in showing the treasures of the rain forest to visitors like us. "The rain forests are perhaps the most extraordinary phenomena at Olympic," he said with evident exuberance. "The term is usually applied to tropical forests. Ours here are among the less extensive rain forests in temperate latitudes." When I ask for an explanation, Mike is quick with the math: The forests are fed by the abnormally high rainfall on the western slopes of the Olympic Mountains, ranging from about 80 inches [200 cm] a year near the coast to 150 inches [400 cm] or more along the river valleys in the foothills. Three valleys contain most of the rain forests: those of the Hoh, Queets, and Quinault rivers.

Our footsteps on the nearly two feet [.5 m] of duff on the forest floor are muffled. The thickness of the trees keeps out wind; even the rain that so frequently falls here filters down as a sort of green mist. The sun reaches us at the forest floor only in tiny, blurred patches. The softest birdsong seems loud, and occasionally deer flit like brown ghosts among the moss-laden trunks.
Why So Much Rainfall?

Moisture-laden clouds blowing inland from a warm Pacific coastal current are forced to rise by the high barrier of the Olympic Mountains. As the clouds ascend, they cool, and their moisture condenses into heavy rain or snow. Thus, the western slope of the mountains receives upwards of 140 inches [350 cm] of precipitation per year. Mount Olympus receives some 200 inches [500 cm], falling mostly as snow. However, land on its eastern side lying in what is known as a rain shadow stays comparatively dry.
Where Trees Sprout on Other Trees

Since the ground cover is so dense, seeds rarely get a chance to grow—which is why most of the biggest trees in the forest sprouted from nurse logs. These are fallen, decomposing trees that act as a fertile host to seeds that drop onto them. It is not uncommon to see several great trees growing in a line along one fallen giant, and the prevalence of nurse logs accounts for the occasional occurrence of colonnades of trees—as if they had been carefully planted in rows.

As we leave behind the level trails and climb higher into the Olympics, the forest changes, with record-size Pacific silver fir and alpine fir being the predominant species. Mount Olympus has 7 glaciers on its flanks, with ice 900 feet [300 m] thick in places, and there are more than 50 glaciers in the high country.


Flowers and deer
In the alpine meadows, there are many deer and unique plants, such as the Flett violet

Jagged Peaks and Glacier-Mantled Ramparts

The calories burned on that strenuous hike had to be replaced. Thus, our next day started with a hearty breakfast at a diner in Port Angeles. Arlene, our friendly waitress, was thrilled not so much with the rainfall in the area as with the snow. She insisted that we would see nothing of the wonders of the Olympics if we didn't visit higher ground toward the eastern snowcapped slopes of the park.

As we followed the road east of Port Angeles to Deer Park, we soon found ourselves on mostly steep unpaved roadway with a succession of hairpin turns. We were rewarded with a magnificent view both to the north and to the south, across the Strait of Juan de Fuca to Vancouver Island and toward the lofty, icy heart of the Olympic Mountains. In the alpine meadows, we could see numerous deer and some delicate plants that grow nowhere else on earth, including the piper bellflower and the Flett violet.

Next we came to Hurricane Ridge. It is easy to see why the road leading to it is a popular mountain highway in the park. It is a good road, starting near park headquarters and finishing at an altitude of 5,757 feet [1,755 m] in flowering meadows right on the edge of the Olympics. From there, the mountains extend into the distance to the south, a succession of snowy peaks with glaciers filling the valleys between them. As we gazed at the view, piled masses of clouds scurried across from the west.

The first avalanche lilies bloom as the snow withdraws from the meadows, and for the next three months, there is a succession of colorful flowers. Browsing deer can be seen against the splendid mountain backdrop, and sometimes mountain goats can be spotted clinging to the steep cliffs above the highway.
The Pounding Surf of the Pacific
Rialto Beach
Driftwood along Rialto Beach

Access to the very best of the Olympic beaches is for the hiker rather than the driver. Hiking through the woods from the eastern town of Forks, we reached beaches with tide pools that were full of endlessly fascinating marine life. Beyond Teahwhit Head, we came upon the Giants Graveyard, a confused offshore jumble of contorted rock formations that break the huge Pacific surges into foam. Trees along these shores are bent almost flat by the constant push of the battering wind off the sea. As we walked down into the gale, we were surrounded by beautifully shaped driftwood and smoothly polished stones.

For us the Olympic National Park experience was essentially one of wildness and timelessness. It filled us with awe for the Creator, "he in whose hand are the inmost depths of the earth and to whom the peaks of the mountains belong; to whom the sea, which he himself made, belongs and whose own hands formed the dry land itself.

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